DURING MY TIME in the federal courtroom where Judge Harold Murphy was sentencing Attorney George Houser on Monday, I had such an uneasy and unsettled spirit. I even left the courtroom after Mr. Houser was sentenced to 20 years with no mercy shown, with that unsettled spirit still there. I could not understand why I could not settle my spirit. I even said to myself that I felt as if I had attended a funeral of a man who had been buried alive. I just began by asking what was the motivation for me to openly express myself by writing a letter to the editor?

Was there any consideration for his two young children who are under 10 years old? Was there any consideration for him who is now 64 and will be 84 when released? Was there any consideration for the wife? Was there any consideration for the mother of attorney Houser?

Did the federal prosecutors aim for the jugular vein because that was their job to disregard anything positive that the man had done? It is not as if he did not apologize for having made some bad choices in the entire process. Attorney Houser spoke honestly about some of his errors. One was he dared to dream.

But yet there was the judge who said that he had three areas where he could show leniency, but he chose not to. Did he have a made-up mind? It concerned me that he made reference three or more times to the fact that Attorney George Houser was a Harvard graduate. As Langston Hughes wrote, ‘I Wonder as I Wander’.

I also realized and mentioned to myself that emotions after a decision must be tempered with honesty. We are sometimes so aggressive in moments when we think we have been done wrong, but sometimes we need an honest assessment of the full situation. In order for our critique of the system, when we have been wronged, to have any validity, then that means our honesty in moments when we have done wrong must be equal. When we are the victims of injustice, we must have a voice, but that voice must also be clearly heard when we are not victims, but agents of wrong doing. As I pondered my spirit seeking answers, Judge Murphy reviewed the many objections from the defense that he overruled — and they were many. The questions that I still ask are Did Mr. Houser have fair representation? Was the prosecution overly aggressive in creating an image that was not the true picture or the full picture? Was the decision and sentencing an effort to put an entire race back in their place (anti-intellectualism, anti-Obama Harvard graduate) or was it a true representation of the actual crime committed?

I pray that all involved slept well on Monday night with a clear conscience that justice was done and mercy was in the courtroom.